Do you ever sit alone with your thoughts?
Here's why you should learn to value solitude.
This morning it started raining cats and dogs - one of those classic violent, non-stop summer storms that just make you want to stay under the covers.
I was in one of those typical moments when you are overwhelmed by the amount of things to do that you don't even know where to start, so much so that even before starting I decided to stop for a moment.
I did so when, distracted by thoughts, I started to admire the raindrops slowly sliding down the window pane of my little house. It was at that very moment that enlightenment dawned on me and I began a long reflection, a pleasant moment of calm that led me to write these lines.
"Sometimes we are so distracted by life that we miss the little things" – I thought as I admired the rain beating hard on the ground.
I therefore decided to take a moment for myself, to pamper myself and above all to appreciate the little things, sitting alone with my thoughts.
So I brewed myself a warm cup of cocoa bean tea and turned off my phone and my PC; then I began to slowly enjoy my drink, listening only to the sound of the rain and my incessant thoughts, admiring the droplets as they ran off quickly on the glass.
When was the last time you sat alone with your thoughts?
I spent long minutes simply in silence – it had been a long time since I had done that.
I thought how absurd it is that such a simple action in our eyes is so difficult for us.
Too often we believe we know how to be alone but then we forget that we always have the phone within our reach, a book to read, some music in our ears or the television in the background... Instead, I would like you to reflect on this question:
"when was the last time you sat alone with your thoughts?"
By putting aside any form of distraction, you will begin to notice details that you have never grasped or to which you have never attached any value, just as it happened to me by following the path of the drops walking on the window pane.
The most beautiful thing moreover (which makes one smile) is finally being able to listen to oneself.
Why shouldn't you run away from your thoughts?
With no way to distract yourself, you will automatically start thinking.
Thoughts will start running wild in your head and if there is one thing I have learnt from solo journeys and moments like this morning, it is the importance of listening and accepting them.
How often do we try to push away our doubts, our worries, our anxieties? Yet these are crucial key moments as they make us see our thoughts from different perspectives, generating other forms of judgment that can help us unburden our minds.
Often we find it easier to “escape” from the thoughts that weigh us down, but it is crucial to keep in mind that the more we try to push a thought away, the more frequently it will recur and so it is here that I would like you to reflect and give yourself a few minutes to be alone and listen to your mind.
Solitude as a means to know oneself
For many years now I have been searching daily for new stimuli, methods and habits to be able to improve my state of mental well-being, and there is one very important thing I have learnt: to be able to take concrete action to improve oneself, it is fundamental, before anything else, to learn to know oneself, and if I have been able to do this, it is only thanks to having learnt to appreciate solitude.
Unfortunately, we often tend to give “solitude” a despicable meaning, and the only real reason we do this is because we unconsciously do not really know how to be alone, and therefore we feel it is important to always surround ourselves with people.
Yet if you think about it:
how many times have you felt lonely among dozens of people?
Personally, many, maybe too many, and it took me a long time to learn this, but it was precisely when I started to reflect in moments of loneliness like these that I realized the true meaning and importance of learning to appreciate one's own company, one's own thoughts, and introspection.
Do not be afraid of your mind.
It is powerful but you are more powerful and you have the power to tame it.
The only way is by challenging yourself and listening to yourself by accepting all your thoughts, from the beautiful to the difficult ones.
Learn to appreciate the details and sit with them in solitude: you can see new perspectives and receive new stimuli. Often it is things like this that make you smile, and if it takes so little, why not give it a try?
I really hope that reading these lines has made you reflect and made you realize the importance of being able to accept our thoughts, just like I did when creating this article.
Have a good life!